It's time for me to ramble...to have a musing...it's been a while!
We had a fabulous week. Christmas was wonderful, and the kids' time off school was (aside from a little squabbling!) wonderful as well. I can't believe school starts back up for the new year in just 2 days!
As I think about the last few days, our last days of 2011, I think they are probably indicative of 2012. Although only God knows what 2012 holds...
Like years before, part of the kids' Christmas present is taking them to a hotel/ indoor waterpark. What fun!!
Summer was finally tall enough to go down the waterslide, so Mom and Summer went down lots of times!
Summer, Shianne and Sierra all made new friends at the waterpark. So fun to see. But my favorite part? Watching our kids play together. Siblings that don't usual play together enjoying each other. Ahhh...LOVE it. Love it. Love.
And of course, Momma and Daddy playing with the kiddos as well. Oh, and the two of us enjoyed the hot tub. *smile*
After bumming around a bit on Saturday, we spent New Years Eve with good friends.
A couple of us didn't make it till New Years!
(my precious boy)
My darling hubby reached over and gave me a kiss at 12:00. Shianne was first in with the "gross." But she also noticed hilariously that as soon as we kissed applause came on over the radio.
I told her that sometimes when Mom and Dad kiss, we even see fireworks. *smile*
So not 15 seconds later what do we see? Fireworks! Seriously, someone was shooting fireworks. What a hoot. We've still got it, Babe!
Got home and all kiddos and Brandy went to bed. It was about 12:15.
And for the next...oh...45 minutes?
I sobbed.
Yep. Great way to start the new year.
Not a tearful, cute cry. Nope. Blubbering.
Sigh.
Why?
Well, we have to make a decision. And I told my hubby he has to cuz I. can't. do. it.
Kalli, my first baby, our cocker spaniel, is 16 1/2 years old. That is seriously old for a dog. Life expectancy for a cocker spaniel is twelve. Do the math. She's like 115 in dog years.
She's been deaf for years, going blind (but not there yet, still gets around fine, just has a little trouble in the dark), is on arthritis meds and meds so she doesn't lose bladder control in the house.
And recently? Ear infection. Serious one. From a growth in her ear. Weird, I know. But sometimes as dogs age they get these weird bumps/growths on them. She has them all over and one in her ear. Right now it is really raw and infected. And oozes black stuff. She's been on antibiotic for over a couple weeks and it really isn't getting much better.
But the bad part about that? Her infection stinks. Seriously stinks. Gag stinks. So every few days I'm washing it out.
We can handle stink right? Sure. But my allergies can't. I'm really sensitive to certain smells.
We picked Kalli and Shelby up from the kennel (wonderful friends have a loving kennel, we're so blessed that way) after the trip, and yes, she stunk. I started feeling yucky.
I immediately gave her a bath (well, both of them cuz Shelby had that lovely doggie smell). But before I was done, my head hurt, my throat hurt, and I had muscle weakness. I ended up taking a nap to recover. Dumb allergies.
Kalli can have surgery to remove the growth. But she's at a risk of not waking up after being put out. Cuz she's sixteen (and a half).
And surgery is not cheap. And will it work? And how much time will it buy her? A month? A year? And will she go blind in that time and have no quality of life?
The blubbering came from this question: Is it time?
I tear up just typing it. And that's crazy cuz we've been wondering when the time would come for years. I thought I'd be ready.
But I'm not. And how in the world would we explain it to the kids? And, doggone it (no pun intended), do great wonderful awesome pets go to Heaven? Wish I knew.
Cuz she's pretty special. As the tears started flowing last night I remembered when we were first married. She was my first baby. If I would cry back then she would come up to me and lick my tears.
Well, that thought unleashed the flood.
And if we did decide it was time? It would be hard for me to spend good-bye time with her without getting sick.
Sigh. You know, I've prayed that God would just take her. That I'd wake up one morning and she'd be gone. But it doesn't seem like that's His plan.
So prayers for this decision are much appreciated.
But that's why today I decided the past few days are probably indicative of 2012. Even though I have no idea what's in store. But this is what I imagine.
Wonderful times spent with family.
Great times spent with friends.
Magical times with applause and fireworks.
And tough times when the tears flow, so we appreciate all the rest.
Happy New Year, my blogging friends!!
"I wish you enough sun to keep your attitude bright
no matter how gray the day may appear.
I wish you enough rain
to appreciate the sun even more.
I wish you enough happiness
to keep your spirit alive and everlasting.
I wish you enough pain
so that even the smallest of joys in life may appear bigger.
I wish you enough gain to satisfy your wanting.
I wish you enough loss
to appreciate all you posses.
I wish you enough hellos
to get you through the good-byes."
--Anonymous
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